IT'S NOT EASY BEING STIG
As webmaster, I have a lot of material to cover after the BOB Tourney. There's Hamhocks being offensive (not his usual offensive self, I mean playing offense), there's Robes' team OUT in round #1, there's Rasheed Eccles going from 0-14 to the finals, there's Gardner getting in a motorcycle accident on the way to BOB and still playing, there's the Champions themselves, there's Ricky J-Man walking the walk, there's Mark going in the tank because he had somewhere else to go and, most of all, there's 73-year old Jose Gonsalves easily winning the prestigious MVP award. But, the story I have to start with has to do with Chad "Stigmata" Pimental. If you refer to the gardnertheassassin website, there's an article of how Chainsaw (or as Hamhocks calls him, "Hacksaw") gently asked Stig to be quiet regarding foul calls late in the game.Did Stigmata learn his lesson? NO! At BOB, in the playoffs no less, Stig started his whining once again and had to be spoken to by Champion Kurtis Gonsalves. Was Kurtis as kind as gentle as Chainsaw? Negative! Kurtis blatantly told Stig to "SHUT UP". The decible level that Kurtis hit while screaming this at Stig seemed to stun Chad. I personally didn't hear Stig utter another word until well after the new champions had been crowned. But what did Stigmata utter then, you may ask? Well, Stigmata, who had declared the previous week that "I'm not a numbers guy" (whatever that means), jumped on Commisioner Roberge and his able assistant NC that he didn't appreciate the way that the numbers were displayed on the official BOB toteboard. Stig couldn't tell which team had done what and castigated Robes for his inefficency with the board and the numbers displayed thereon. This from the guy who's not a numbers guy. Now, most everybody who was there would have to admit that Stigmata played well during the BOB. On the official BOB videotape, Stigmata's name is called out numerous times by the commentator for his outstanding play. Unfortunately, Chad once again doesn't get it. He complained about the amoeba defense versus the 2-2-2 defense (only Stig knows what a 2-2-2 even is, especially in a 3 on 3 tourney), he complained that Chainsaw was a bad boy at the end of the previous week's games, he complained that Kurtis, about to be crowned Champion, was not a nice man, but the king (and I don't mean Cliff) of all Stigmata's atrocities was calling out Steve Roberge for doing a poor job at the BOB. As much as I do not appreciate Robes, even I have to admit that he did an outstanding job working out the kinks of the BOB tourney. For Stigmata, who's not a numbers guy, to complain about how the numbers of the wins and losses were displayed on the chalkboard is totally outrageous. I have to concur with Chainsaw and Kurtis the Champion - Chad, SHUT UP.
The gardnertheassassin website has a BOB story on the ABOUT PAGE. |
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GARDNER GOES PSYCHO - ATTACKS ROBES UNPROVOKED
Jeff Gardner (formerly known as "MVP" but now known as "The Assassin") sullied his reputation even further today (8/7) as he viciously attacked a disabled Steve Roberge with malice aforethought. It all started off with a hobbled Robes showing up courtside unable to perform on the Blacktop due to injuries sustained from the Assassin last week (see the Homepage article). The ever-affable Spec threw out the olive branch to Mr. Gardner, who promptly told Robes to stick the branch, olives and all, where the sun doesn't shine. Robes, still reeling from that development, was further taken aback when the Assassin advised him that he better not play this week (Wednesday @ 1800 hours or Saturday @ 0900 hours) or he would bust Spec's spleen. Then, to add insult to injury, as Roberge retreated from Gardner's verbal barrage, with a decided limp from his ankle and hip injuries, the Assassin drilled a basketball at Spec's back (of course) at very close range. As the ball whizzed by Robes' head at a high rate of speed, after being launched by Gardner from about 5 feet away, Spec spun around, as fast as a handicapped person in his condition can, and eyeballed the Assassin. Gardner, ever the intimidator, merely smirked at Robes as our game ball went into the pool. The ball had been thrown with such force by the Assassin that, when it struck the water, it made a splash as gargantuan as a fat kid doing a cannonball off of the high diving board. As Robes scurried from the scene into the safety of his vehicle, the game ball was retreived from the pool by an unknown Blacktopper. Nobody said a word to the Assassin about our game ball being drenched for fear of being his next victim. Twenty minutes later, after the game ball had dried out, play was resumed on the Blacktop, with everybody giving Gardner a wide avenue to conduct his mayhem. It appeared that, after everybody had seen what happened to Steve Roberge, nobody at the deSilva residence was in any hurry to get in the Assassin's way or, in any way, to mix it up with him.
"LITTLE BITCH"
Saturday, July 3rd, at the Blacktop begs the question: how far is too far? When it comes to antagonizing, I must admit that I go to extremes at Steve Roberge's expense (witness this website). However, there are limits. I would never make fun of Robes' mother or call him a derogatory name. Those are two things that must, in the consideration of fair play, not be broached. Unfortunately, not everybody plays by the rules. It is my understanding that a few years ago Paul Gaffney referred to Kurtis Gonsalves as "his bitch". This pre-dates my Blacktop initiation so I really can't comment on that remark, but I was a participant, to an admittedly small degree, today at the deSilva residence. Amidst much animosity, Kurtis Gonsalves was told to just call the foul and belay the commentary on his foul call. Kurtis, as a senior member of the Blacktop, did not take kindly to that summation of his foul call and vehemently made his displeasure known. Luckily, cooler heads prevailed and nobody had their jaw dislocated. Later, while relaxing poolside, it was revealed that another senior member of the Blacktop, Ambrose Smith, was referred to as a "little bitch". Ambrose, for those of you who weren't there, had mistakenly been bodyslammed to the deck, causing numerous abrasions and contusions, while driving to the basket. Initially, Mr. Smith was somewhat upset by this development but, after getting to his feet and realizing that the person who had dropped him would never do anything like that on purpose, quickly disregarded the entire incident, even though his kneecap had a bad case of road rash. But, to everybody's dismay, it was later revealed that Mr. Smith had been designated as a "little bitch" regarding the incident. Not since Paul Gaffney, to this writer's memory, have those words been uttered to describe a fellow Blacktopper. Incidents like this must cease and desist. While I have absolutely no respect for Steve Roberge's basketball talents, I have never referred to him, or anybody else at the Blacktop, as a "bitch". I love to banter with Mr. Roberge, but there have to be limits to the dissing. Head jokes are certainly allowed, as well as a number of other slights, but calling a brother member of the Blacktop league a "bitch" is out of bounds in my humble opinon. If you're going to call somebody a "bitch" I just hope that you can back it up. If that's not the case it may be best to just shut up.
SEE ROBES VS. GARDNER - ROUND II - AT SOME POINT IN THE FUTURE
More to come on this subject.
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